“Why are we not better than we are?” Eric Trethewey from Frost on the Fields, a poem I walk the streets of my neighborhood alone. I search for harbingers of spring. I find omens instead. Crumpled masks litter the gutter. A feral cat skitters away to a hidey hole. It’s the mucky middle of winter. … More Mid-Winter
“Whatever is happening is the path to enlightenment.” Pema Chodron I am a fifteen year veteran of Multiple Myeloma, a blood cancer of plasma cells. The majority of MMers have a life expectancy of around five years at the time of diagnosis. Approximately 20% of patients with this disease persist longer. I’m on the lucky … More The University of Cancer, Part Five
It’s the winter of life. Ads for funeral services pepper my mailbox. Mortuaries stalk people my age. The implication, I suppose, is that I don’t have too many decades left. It’s nice to be wanted. Eventually, I’ll buy what they have to sell. But, for now, I’ll wait. There are more songs to write. It’s … More The Winter of Life
I live in Hood River, Oregon. The river for which it is named flows north from the foothills of the Mt. Hood National Forest. Its three forks converge ten miles south of town. My youngest son and his family shelter in place near that spot. From there it meanders through woods, pastures, and orchards before … More Sorry, We’re Closed
1969 was a hell of a year. Astronauts from Apollo 11 walked on the moon. The Beatles released Abbey Road, their final album. A national draft lottery was held for men, aged 18-26. In Massachusetts, a tragic auto accident occurred on Chappaquiddick Island. Out west, Charles Manson’s cult committed horrendous murders. That summer, thousands flocked to … More No Other Anywhere
Recently, I attended a presentation titled, Multiple Myeloma, State of the Art. The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society hosted the speaker at its monthly MM support group meeting. I joined the group in 2009, a little over one year after being diagnosed with this blood cancer. It’s an active group with dozens of participants. Several are … More The University of Cancer, Part 2
“You are the sky; everything else is just the weather.” Pema Chodron In late February, with the advent of spring, the prevailing path of storm fronts rotates from east to west. Temperatures rise. Precipitation presents itself as rain instead of snow. Depending on your disposition, Oregon’s default weather forecast is now either partly cloudy or … More Clouds
Lately, the morning sky has drawn me outdoors before first light. There, under the comfort of a blanket, I recline in a deck chair on the front porch. The planets Venus and Jupiter are prominent out east this month. And, due to the absence of streetlights in our remote part of the Hood River Valley, … More Star Gazing
In January, I met with Dr. M. Once again, my cancer showed signs of awakening. I feel good. I am not overtly symptomatic. Nevertheless, the myeloma stretched and yawned. After a nearly 2 1/2-year nap, my drug-free remission was about to end. Since last October, we’ve discussed a course of action. I digested statistics from clinical trial … More Choices
My iris blooms arrived in May and departed in June. Most of the lavender flowers shriveled unattractively on their stalks and I cut them off. Yesterday, I dug a colony of these bulbs from my perennial beds. I shook off the dirt, storing them in a paper bag. I’ve four more clumps to remove, energy willing. … More It’s Complicated
Good Blood, Bad Blood 